When You're Caught in the Wave 🌊
Sometimes when you're in it, whether it's an intense wave of grief, anxiety, or conflict, it can feel like too much. Like life has knocked you off your board and you're getting pummeled by a wave.
As a new surfer, this is one of my biggest fears in the water. That washing machine feeling of being tossed around, disoriented, and unsure which way is up. And yet, somehow, I’ve managed to my find way back to the surface. In the ocean and in life.
There’s a practice I really love that I often share with clients.
Imagine your life is a movie. And whatever’s happening right now, (maybe a fight with your partner, burnout from work, or helplessness around a family member) that’s what’s playing on the screen.
Now picture yourself in the theater lobby. You’re cracking the door open, popping your head in to see what’s unfolding. But from where you are, you feel okay. You're no longer caught inside the scene. From where you are, there’s space. And with that space comes a new perspective.
“Between stimulus and response there is a space. In that space is our power to choose our response. In our response lies our growth and our freedom.”
— Viktor Frankl
This is the moment things get to shift. You realize you’re not just in the movie, but you also get to play director. The scene is about to change, and you have the ability to decide what’s next.
But before the next scene begins, you ask yourself, “What’s this part of the movie trying to show me?”
Because every movie has a message. Oftentimes, the heart of the story lies in how we move through the hard parts and how we choose to respond.
A simple example of this might be a character who’s burned out, working long days, carrying an unconscious pressure to keep pushing. But once she realizes what’s playing on the screen, the scene can shift. Maybe in the next one, she’s lying in a garden, basking in the sun. Together, we explore what’s keeping her from the garden, and begin the work of dismantling those barriers.
When you create space to reflect on your role in the movie, you begin to remember you get to also take role as director and have the power to change the narrative.