Your Destiny Is to Evolve: A Practice to Reconnect with Who You Are and Who You’re Becoming
I believe we’re all on a journey of becoming wiser human beings—learning, growing, and transforming through the experiences life places on our path. As the saying goes, “We can’t stop the waves, but we can learn how to surf.”
As a therapist, I draw on both my teaching and counseling experience to help people become more skillful at riding those waves. The journey often begins with telling your story. But something I’ve noticed is that when people share their stories, they often leave out one really important part: their strengths.
In my work with clients, I often invite them to sit with two simple yet revealing questions:
What are four things you know to be true about who you are today that you feel proud of?
What are four qualities or ways of being you're stepping into—your future self calling you forward?
We’ve all heard about the power of affirmations. But instead of repeating something you hope will feel true, this practice invites you to name what already is—and what’s quietly emerging.
This kind of self-reflection can be especially powerful during times of grief, transition, or change—moments when our sense of identity feels shaky or forgotten. Naming what’s true about who you are right now is like anchoring yourself in the storm. And the more we practice self-awareness, the more self-love can begin to take root.
Here are a few examples:
I know I’m someone who shows up with care, even when it’s hard.
I know I’m someone with a good sense of humor.
I’m stepping into someone who speaks her truth more often.
My future self is confident and glowing.
This practice reminds us that our future wise self is already within reach—cheering us on, applauding our emergence.
The beauty of this is that in moments of uncertainty, you don’t need to have it all figured out to know what matters to you.
Try This Today:
First, check in with yourself: Where are you on a scale of 1–10?
(1 = depleted or anxious, 10 = grounded and centered)Then ask:
What are four things I know to be true about myself that I’m proud of?
What are four things I’m stepping into?
Afterward, check in again: Did anything shift for you just from naming those truths?
This is one of my favorite practices to share with clients. It may seem simple, but I’ve seen how powerful it can be. The act of naming your strengths, not to prove anything, but to remember what’s already true—can shift how you relate to yourself and your path. It’s a simple practice, but one that leads to real change.
I believe growth isn’t about becoming someone else. It’s about remembering who you already are—and letting that version of you lead more often.
Inspired Reading & Resources:
This practice is inspired in part by the work of Dr. Rick Hanson and Amy Cuddy—both of whom explore how cultivating inner strengths and embodied awareness can shift how we relate to ourselves and the world around us.
Dr. Rick Hanson – Neuropsychologist and author of Hardwiring Happiness and Resilient, Dr. Hanson explores how we can internalize positive experiences to rewire the brain for greater inner strength, calm, and resilience.
Amy Cuddy – Social psychologist and author of Presence, Amy Cuddy’s work highlights how posture, body language, and self-affirmation can increase our confidence and help us step into our power—especially in moments of transition.