Grief & Loss
Turn toward grief as a sacred companion.
“Grief is not a problem to be solved; it’s a presence awaiting your witnessing.”
– Francis Weller.
Grief can be disorienting
It alters how we perceive ourselves, others, and the world around us. Whether you’re grieving the death of someone you love, the end of a relationship, a significant transition, or a loss that’s hard to name, this is a space for your experience to be seen and cared for.
Grief work found me. It was not something I set out to specialize in. It was something life handed me. My own experience with loss shapes how I hold space for others, honoring the non-linear and sacred nature of grief.
I’m here to accompany you through the shifting landscape of grief, with respect for the many ways it moves through you.
Grief is a sacred landscape
On some level, we are all grieving. Maybe it’s the state of the world we thought we’d be living in.
Perhaps it is an unlived dream, leaving a city you once called home, the end of a relationship you thought would last, or the loss of someone you love.
So often, I hear clients say they’re afraid to engage with grief – afraid they’ll never stop crying, or that if they go there, they’ll never come back. It can feel like a bottomless pit. But the paradox is: if we don’t engage with it, we may never fully return to ourselves.
Grief pulls us out of our center. Francis Weller writes that it “invites us to the wild edge of sorrow,” the place where our soul feels most alive. And while that edge can feel disorienting, it’s also sacred. Tending to grief is like hygiene for the soul.
Engage with grief rather than endure it
Grief isn’t something to get over, rather than it is something to engage with.
Writing, dream work, imagination, movement, and ritual all become ways to alchemize sorrow into meaning.
Grief asks for two things: containment and release. Containment through being held in community.
Release occurs through allowing what’s been stored to move through tears, breath, story, or sound.
When we allow both, grief becomes less of a problem to solve and more of a companion to walk beside.
How I approach grief work
My approach integrates Internal Family Systems (IFS), mindfulness, and somatic practices, grounded in Claire Bidwell Smith’s four-part grief orientation: Entering, Engaging, Surrendering, and Transforming.
In our work, we explore what it means to be in right relationship with grief and to trust its intelligence and collaborate with it rather than resist it.
We might use breathwork, writing, or movement to regulate the nervous system.
Sometimes we write. Sometimes we cry. Sometimes we laugh. All of it belongs. Grief lives with us and changes shape over time. At times it feels heavy, at others more tender, but it is always asking to be felt.
Grief & the Heart is an ongoing support group
For those who want to experience this work in a community setting, I offer Grief & the Heart: An Ongoing Group for Grief and Loss, a space to explore the inner landscape of grief together.
Each session includes a short reflection and weekly theme, a guided mindfulness or somatic practice, time to share, witness, and receive support within the community, group details, meetings on Zoom, and open and ongoing sessions.
Together, we’ll explore how to stay resourced in the midst of uncertainty.
Here’s my invitation
Grief isn’t something to get over. Instead, it’s something to honor.
When shared in a circle, it begins to find a bottom. It can be met, witnessed, and slowly tended to.
If you’re longing for a space like that, I offer a free 20-minute consultation to join our ongoing group.
Schedule a consult or email cathyltrenary@gmail.com to begin.
You can view my profile on the Grief Support Center National Directory, a resource connecting people to grief support professionals nationwide, here: https://www.griefsupportcenter.com/california/los-angeles/grief-support-provider/cathy-trenary